TOXIC SHAME

 

Toxic Shame

 

What keeps someone struggling with food addiction and compulsive eating ? Why is it so hard to end that vicious cycle of emotional eating and binging ?

For many people it is the pain of feeling “toxic shame”. Psychotherapist and author, John Bradshaw, has written extensively about shame and how it can keep someone paralyzed in dysfunctional patterns. When a compulsive eater uses food to feel better, to run from painful emotions or stress, he/she is entering a spiraling cycle of eating.

This can be perplexing for many because it is hard to understand how powerful toxic shame can be when you are under its spell. Someone who is feeling toxic shame believes that they ARE wrong, bad, unworthy. This kind of thinking ultimately leads to more emotional pain and poor self worth. These feelings then lead to more running from emotion by numbing out with food. You can see how toxic shame can keep someone trapped in an unhealthy and dangerous cycle.

At the Kayenta Lifestyle Transformation Program, we help people get out of the shame cycle and rid themselves of the false core beliefs that hold them in that cycle. We teach how “Healthy Shame” can actually be your ally in stopping compulsive eating.

For more information about how to end your unhealthy relationship with food through the Lifestyle Transformation Program, please contact me at:

     lifecoachally@gmail.com

               or

     kayentatherapy.com

We all have the right to live an energized, connected, balanced life! Make yours happen.

Karie Lindsay, MSW, Certified Professional Coach

 

Emotional Eating

Emotional Eating

 

Emotional eating is a very human experience. We don’t just use food for fuel, we use it to celebrate, to comfort, to ease stress, to show love, and to medicate painful emotions. So when does emotional eating turn from something moderate and natural into something that is compulsive and unhealthy?

When emotional eating takes a turn into a type of eating that becomes unmanageable, automatic and with negative consequences, we call it compulsive eating. Compulsive eating can become a very vicious cycle for people who become dependent on food as a numbing agent against painful emotions. Our brains actually reinforce this kind of eating by setting up neurological pathways that allow “feel good” chemicals to surge through our systems when we binge on foods that are high in sugar, fats and salt. So, we get a mood altering neurochemical effect from eating which can become habitual for people.

This intense emotional eating can exact a heavy toll on one’s physical, emotional and social life.

Not everyone who compulsively eats deals with obesity. For the large majority of people obesity is one of the devastating negative physical consequences that comes from their unhealthy relationship with food. But, there are others who are secretly at war in their heads with food, but you might never know it. This is a painful and lonely emotional life to live.

There is help for compulsive eating, binge eating, intense emotional overeating, food addiction. Whatever you wish to call it, it is an epidemic in our society, and more resources and programs are needed which target this underserved population.

Here in Las Vegas, I direct a program called Kayenta Lifestyle Transformation. This is an outpatient compulsive eating program which helps clients to change the way they eat, live and connect to their life.

For more information, please visit: Kayentatherapy.com Click on the help for compulsive eating tab.

Take the brave step of caring for yourself and those around you by seeking help.                         

                                                  Karie Lindsay,MSW,CPC

 

What Lifecoaching Can Do For You

Lifecoaching is a buzzword these days. It has become a very popular option for many individuals who do not wish to delve into their past with psychotherapy. Instead, they want to analyze their present and plan for their future. Their hope is that their future will be shaped into the more balanced, more successful, more happy life they envision.

Who is the perfect lifecoaching client? Everybody ! Children, adolescents, adults, seniors; anyone who is needing help to reach the goals he/she needs to reach.

Do your children need help in organizing their study habits, becoming more social, or handling bullying? Lifecoaching can help them in these endeavors.

Are you wanting to have a more lucrative career, a happier and more connected relationship, a more balanced life? Lifecoaching can help.

Do you need assistance with handling life's transitions such as grieving for your loss of a loved one, dealing with life after divorce or a breakup, changing lifestyles or careers? Lifecoaching can help you process the changes and plan for your future.

These are just a few of the ways the coaching process can help you. Contact me to get started on your process. You have strengths and abilities that I will help you put to work for yourself and your life.

Defining Yourself

Have you ever tried to explain who you are?

Many times we have an idea of how we act and feel from day to day, but does that mean we know who we really are? I think that coming to know ourselves is one of the most important things we can do to make our lives more fulfilling. I need to know what I value, what kind of people I want in my life, what I want to do to make me happy in my work, what motivates me and what gives me joy.

Asking these kinds of questions of ourselves can lead to insight and some new views of who you are. Actually sitting down with a pen and paper to answer the following questions will lead you to a better understanding of who you are. Then you will be able to analyze whether you are being true to yourself in the way you are conducting your life, or not.

What are the priorities in my life at this time?
What do I value?
What principles do I live my life by?
Am I currently following these principles?
What makes me happy?
What makes me sad?
What makes me angry?
What makes me fearful?
Do I like to have time alone or do I prefer to be with others?
Am I physically and emotionally as healthy as I want to be?
Is it important to be connected to my family?
How do I define success?
If I could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Am I a leader or one who feels more comfortable following?

Taking the time to do some writing and thinking on this subject is a great way to ready yourself for the New Year. Make it a point to know who you are in 2012!

Time For Yourself

It happens everyday! We run from place to place. We drop our kids at school, we run errands, we get to work just in time, we work through lunch. We take care of our kids' needs, we take care of our pets' needs, we take care of our homes and yards, we care for our elderly parents and we take care of our spouses/partners.

When is it time to care for ourselves ?

Isn't it funny that most of us run around caring for others the majority of the time and disregard our own needs? The need for time for ourselves, to care of our physical, emotional and spiritual needs is something we need to pay attention to. It takes a willingness to carve out time from your busy schedule to make that doctor's appointment, or get to that yoga class, or to take that walk or to write in that journal you have been meaning to start. But, the payoff can be huge!

You'll have more energy and a feeling of energized well being if you make caring for your own needs a priority as much as possible. This may sound impossible to you, and if it does, I can help you structure your life so that you have time for you. The people in your life will notice your more balanced and happy life.

Try it! Find out how it feels to put yourself first! You deserve it!